The holidays are nearly over...

Big sigh of relief. I am ready to settle back into a normal routine definitely. I did have a fabulous christmas though!! My husband surprised me with a car I had been wanting!!! I'll post a picture of myself in it later. WOO-HOO!!

Just playing...

Oh how cute are we?? I was playing with my options and decided to try posting a photo. Looks good eh? This is my husband and I (obviously on our wedding day) and those gorgeous girls peeking through the rail are ours.

A Trip Down Memory Lane

Tonight I spent about 4 hours helping a friend clean his house for his walk-through before closing. It was hard but a lot of fun and a little closure for me. I didn't really need closure but it was there for the taking.
This friend...I have known him for 10 years, five of which we were dating or engaged. 1 of those years I lived in this house we were cleaning.
It was really interesting to reflect back on the person I was back then and the person I am now.
So, a little list in honor of my trip down memory lane

THEN

• No children or desire to have children
• Totally self absorbed
• Complete slob
• Sure I would marry him and live happily ever after
• Worked 50+ hours a week
• Seriously worried about my appearance and what other people thought of me
• 120 pounds and thought I was fat!

NOW

• 2 children
• Who can be self absorbed when you have 2 children and a husband??
• Slobbier than I'd like to be but no where NEAR how I was then!!
• Definitely did not marry him but I did get married and both of us know our lives are better now than they ever would have been together
• I work 100+ hours a week all from the comfort of my home and all without pay! :-)
• Not worried enough about my appearance and I have abandoned even a fleeting thought of what anyone else thinks
• 140 pounds and would KILL to look as smokin' hot as I did then! (and I know in 10 years I will think, "man, I would kill to look as smokin hot as I did ten years ago)

My "family"

You know how people refer to some of their really close friends as family? I always thought (in fact, I still do) that people whose friends were their family weren't close to their family or maybe didn't have one.
Today we had our 3rd annual "O'Dells and Friends Christmas Party" which consists of the same people every year. It started out as way to cut the costs of gift giving between my siblings and some friends that we regularly exchange gifts with. It has grown to a "shower the many children with many gifts extravaganza!" We started our gift exchange with two children and 12 adults. It has grown (in 3 years!) to 7 kids and 14 adults!!
Today I looked around the room and thought...
Many of these people really are my family. I have siblings and parents there, an aunt and uncle and a nephew. But there are 4 children and 4 adults that I am not related to in any way. These people really are my family and we are their's. Not one of us has a need for MORE family (quite the contrary) but all of us have an unwavering love for one another. It is a love that has withstood many trials and has seen us through many years. We may not like each other all the time but we are honest with one another and we always know that in the end, there is love that keeps us a family. To Melissa, Gabe, Benji, Erika, Isabel, Jonathan, Erik and Samantha..I love you all so very much and I am proud to call you my family.

A good day indeed

There was a time when I never wanted to be a teacher again. I never wanted to step foot into a classroom and I would never, never, never have worked with someone! BLECK!! Needless to say, I was wounded. There were all sorts of factors at play...I was pregnant then a new mom, I was exhausted, I was in a monumental power struggle and I was not supported or even heard when it was glaringly obvious something was WRONG!!! Hmmm...I wonder why no one makes it to year two with this teacher??? Anyway, I said all that to say this. I am tentatively testing the water again and the water is NICE!! I am teaching one day a week in my daughters class so her teacher (who happens to be a really good friend) can work a four day week. We work long days (730-530) and with children so she deserves a break and this way I get to trade and I don't pay real money, just labor, for my daughter to go to preschool. It's all good. I have to say I was a bit nervous in starting this little adventure but I made a commitment to do it for one year and then decide. Well, I think it's going pretty well. First and foremost, my daughter LOVES school. I mean seriously LOVES it. She loves her teacher and her teacher loves her!! That is the best part. And working with someone else is going very well too. We are friends so that makes it easier but there was a time in our lives when we did work together and it didn't go so well. It was even worse than the really bad year. Not because she was so terrible like that other terrible person but because we had parents getting us involved in their personal dramas, toad-y kids and both of us were trying to work out a comfortable "synch" and we couldn't. It made it worse than the really bad year because she was my friend and we were hurting each other. All that is a long time gone and we are working together just dandy!! So, to her, thank you. Maybe teaching isn't the only thing I want to do but it's certainly something I like to do and thanks for reminding me!
Love this quote...
"A real friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and sings it back to you when you've forgotten the words"

My new year hope, prayer and resolution...

I will not die an unlived life
I will not live in fear
of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,
to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid,
more accessible,
to loosen my heart
until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance,
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom,
and that which came to me as blossom
goes on as fruit.
-Dawna Markova

It's Christmas Time

I'm feeling really great about Christmas this year! I am mostly done shopping. Just a few more things but I know what I'm getting it's just a matter of getting paid again. Woo-Hoo! The only things left to do are have fun, hang out with friends and family and eat a disgusting amount of food. My friend Melissa sent me this super cute "music video" check it out here:

http://badaboo.free.fr/merryxmas.swf

It's so cute. My daughters really loved it.

List Consciousness

"List consciousness is a state of mind that is entirely future-oriented. With a subtle but constant quality of rushing, it operates on the premise that life will happen once everything gets crossed off The List... When you are in list consciousness, you are leaning into the future and completely missing the present. Practicing presence punctures the fantasy that somehow life will begin when the kids soccer season is over or when I lose 10 pounds or even when I take the meditation course and learn how to be more present! Practicing presence is bringing ourselves to the recognition that life is happening right now and it is inviting us to wake up and notice."
-Abby Seixas

Division of Labor

I do believe that this is a problem that most couples experience throughout their relationships. I believe it because I read a survey in a magazine that went something like this: (You believe everything you read, right?)

What percentage of household chores do you do?
Families where husband and wife both work outside the home:
Husband: 25%
Wife: 75%

Families where the husband works outside the home and the wife works at home:
Husband: 10%
Wife: 90%

Does that seem fair to you? No, I didn't think so! I have several theories on why this is so. One for example...Men can stand to wallow in their own filth and squalor and that of others. This is why they can ignore the moldy dishes and wrinkly (sometimes smelly) clothes.

So, here is the problem at my house...
I have been a stay at home mom for about 2 1/2 years and during this time I have done almost all of the househod chores (easily 90%) Needless to say, I have set a precedence. Enter the PROBLEM. I no longer am strictly a stay at home mom. I do spend a lot of time at home and with my children because when I do work I work long days. I am only away from home about 3 out of 7 days. In those 3 days I cram 40+ hours of work. Well, my husband spreads his 40 hours out over 5 days. The problem: To him I still look like a stay at home mom.
Brace yourself for some hokey math...

Assumptions:
*Taking care of the kids is a job
*When the other person is home with you then your time counts as 1/2 time
*This is a Mon-Sat week since neither of us work on Sunday

I spend 42 hours away from home working
I spend 29 hours of waking time with children
Total hours worked: 71

My husband spends 40 hours away from home working
My husband spends 13 hours of waking time with children
Total hours worked:53

hmmmmmmmm
That is all I have to say.
I think I will share this information with my husband.