1) I went to a wedding in an alley and they threw a dirty sock instead of a garter belt and a twinkie wrapper instead of a bouquet.
2) In the event that Matt falls out of this van then you have to substitute. Unless that happens you are DONE!
3) I was sober enough to know that your asses were going to jail!
4) I thought a white Russian was staining your bed.
5) You take the beer, I'll take the wheel.
6) Just don't put those sunglasses in your mouth they came right out of Chris' ass.
7) I thought you boys didn't like girls.
8) Hey, I thought we were going to the trucker porn shop!
9) And Sarah advances to the loser bracket.
10) I don't know what a Jerry's kid is, you ass.
11) That actually feels really good on my butt.
12) You should have hit that girl on the bike then we could have drug her in here and done stuff to her.
Did I mention that on the way there I was the only girl in a van full of 8 (obviously very mature) boys?!
Despite the gross amount of alcohol consumption we actually did do some other things.
We went to OMSI and saw the Body Worlds exhibit. It was cool and a little gross. Jen and I also spent an entire day shopping. I got the cutest dress and shoes from Ann Taylor Loft. It was an outrageous amount of money but I talked myself into it because I can't remember the last time I bought myself something new.
We also went to a cool cabaret/fire dancer show called Sinferno. It was pretty cool.
The wedding itself was great. The place was gorgeous, the food was fantastic and we danced our asses off. I got in trouble for dancing with this super cute 18 year old cowboy...three times. My rationale was that he was a child and everyone else was all.."Uh, you broke his little boy heart when he found out you were married!" Pish-posh!
The other cool thing...The limo driver for the bride and groom loooooved me because he thought I looked like Bridget Fonda so he gave us a ride downtown so we didn't have to call a cab for 10 people!
It was a really good weekend and I definitely needed the adult time.
Want to know the kicker?! I FORGOT MY CAMERA!!!!!
A lot of other people took pictures and I will mercilessly nag them until I get some!